eK-3zmjBImBHOZjRJYEZVBw4ZWs Shaky Mommy: Feeling Sentimental

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Feeling Sentimental

I’m starting to feel very sentimental about this pregnancy. I’ve been attached to the baby for a while, obviously. With my other pregnancies, I didn’t really enjoy the act of being pregnant. I was happy to be pregnant because it meant I was going to have a baby. I enjoyed aspects of being pregnant: feeling the baby move and seeing ultrasound pictures and getting to bond with the baby that way. I enjoyed being able to eat whatever I wanted. I know pregnancy is not really an excuse to eat whatever you want, but I don’t think it’s a time to diet or count calories either.  So I eat what I want, which is mostly healthy, but may include Little Debbie cakes from time to time. Anyway, I’m off track. So I have had what I consider easy labors. They were short and fairly pain free. I didn’t hate labor…in fact, giving birth was exciting for me (again, it’s the baby I looked forward to, and the baby was finally coming out – what’s not to be happy about?). I remember telling someone after my first baby was born that I didn’t particularly enjoy being pregnant and didn’t understand why some people loved it so much.  

But with this baby, I have enjoyed the baby and I have enjoyed being pregnant. Even though I’m achy. Even though I’m way more tired than I have been during other pregnancies.  Even though it has been hard. It’s definitely been harder than the other pregnancies. It might be that I just know it’s the last pregnancy and I’m being sentimental. I like having the baby with me all the time, safe inside me. He moves more than both my other babies did combined and so he’s always letting me know he’s right there, and I like that. I’m still anxious to meet him, but I’m not anxious to stop being pregnant. And I kind of like having him to myself J

I was so ready to get my first baby out and had an induction when she was 5 days late. She was 9lbs 3 oz, and I had a fourth degree episiotomy that came with lots of stitches. So with my second, both my doctor and I wanted to avoid that so we induced a couple of days early. I still had an episiotomy but it wasn’t as bad. This time, while I’m scared of the baby getting too big and would still probably induce if it looked like he was getting too big, I’d really like to go into labor by myself. Not sure if that will happen or not. Based on my previous pregnancies, the chances are probably slim. So I guess maybe I’m also a little sad that I might not get to ever experience what it feels like to go into labor.  Is it silly to want to experience labor?

1 comment:

  1. With all three of my babies, I had an induction. I loved it. I was prepared and had who and what I needed when I needed it. The only exception to this was my first that came way too early (6 weeks) but I still had to have the pitocin to move my body along after leaking amniotic fluid. I don't think I have missed any "experiences" in not going into labor on my own. With all of mine by the time I made it to the hospital I was at least diolated to 4" and my cervix was thinning...my body was on it's way but at the rate that it moves, it could've been weeks! No thank you! I enjoyed my pregnancies, but remember being very anxious to have my body back to myself and meet my little one.

    I think if you just pray and try not to overthink it all, you will do just fine. Listen to your body. Just as it tells you by any cravings, what it needs in nutrition...let it do the same with labor. If at 39 weeeks you are tired and losing patience, then let it go and induce....I don't think you will be losing anything (except another week of aches, pains, and strain!).